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GabeN

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GabeN last won the day on April 29 2016

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  1. Welcome to Stuff Friday! Without further adieu, here's some stuff! The "Meet the Medic" Taunt Capture a point. Shoot a guy. Walk ten feet. Think about walking ten feet and decide not to. Whatever the occasion, celebrate it with the Meet the Medic, a custom taunt that allows you to punctuate anything you do, no matter how trivial, with god rays, orchestral swells and an explosion of doves. The "Schadenfreude" Taunt Pack Science tells us that laughter is the best medicine. Put that theory to the test with the Shadenfreude taunt pack, now available in the Mann Co. store, which gives all nine classes the ability to laugh at a corpse and see if it gets any better. (You could hypothetically also laugh at non-corpse-related objects, we suppose. But what would be the point?) Put Meet the Medic… On Your Wall! Let's say you enjoyed Meet the Medic. Let's say you enjoyed it so much--and especially that one scene where the Medic walks out of his lab all cool with a bunch of doves flying around him--that you wanted to put it up on your wall. First you'd have to buy a big-screen TV. Then you'd have to buy a computer, connect it to the internet, and have the TV play Meet the Medic in an endless loop. Then you’d have to hire a butler to tell you every time that one scene comes up so you can go look at it. And don't forget laser eye surgery so you can see the image at museum quality. Total price: $140,000. Per year. What a bunch of crap, right? Now what if we were to tell you that Valve engineers came up with a better solution? Introducing the limited edition Meet the Medic lithograph, available now at the Valve Store. First come, first serve, folks! Art Man, is your wallpaper stupid. We're just guessing, because compared to the new hi-res, wallpaper-caliber Über Update art now available in the Artwork section, trust us, it's stupid. View the full article
  2. War. Hunh. Yeah. What is it good for? Up until right this second, absolutely nothing. We'll say it again: Absolutely nothing. But now Edwin Starr's going to have to rewrite that stupid song of his to something more accurate, because as of this moment, war is good for something. Like what, you ask? Free stuff. March on over to World War Wednesday for all the detailsâ€â€or "SITREP", as we learned when we stole Tom Clancy's mail. Also, if you weren't eagle-eyed enough to notice, the Scout made a surprise appearance yesterday with a class pack of his own. Why make a class pack an Easter Egg? There's a very good reason. Probably. There's also the real reason, which was that it didn’t fit into our Mobster, Timbuktu or War themes. View the full article
  3. Ahhhhhh, the desert. Sandy, camel-filled seductress. What secrets does she clutch to her fig-stuffed, wind-swept bosoms? Lots. Don't believe us? The Sphinx. Bam. That's just one secret, too. We've got so many we just threw that one away and we don't even miss it. It's probably clear to you by now that we've been doing quite a bit of research about the desert. And why? We're going to write a book about the desert. The great American desert book. We honestly can't believe nobody’s thought of this before. We are going to be billionaires. Anyway, since you're probably already camped out at a bookstore waiting for our desert book to come out, why not take over one of the computers at the information kiosk and enjoy TimbukTuesday? View the full article
  4. Welcome to Day One of the Über Update--the biggest, most ambitious update in the history of Team Fortress 2. We've got a lot to announce as we get closer to the update's release this Thursday, June 23rd. We've been holding one of the surprises pretty close to the vest for months now. We don't want to ruin it, but we'll give you four clues to get you guessing: 1.) It IS a "Meet the" short.2.) It involves ONE of the two remaining classes. 3.) It's NOT the Pyro. 4.) It's the MEDIC. Let the speculation begin! While you're puzzling that out, why not click over to the first of our class pack announcements: Mobster Monday. To make sure everything was as accurate as possible, we went deep undercover at the most Italian place we could find, The Olive Garden. We asked the Mafia about a million questions, none of which they understood, because our mouths were full of all the free breadsticks the Mafia gives you when you visit them (they're not such bad guys). All that hanging out with mob guys must have rubbed off on us, because we've decided to celebrate the Über Update by giving you an offer you can't (or at least shouldn't) refuse--an unprecedented WEEK-LONG FREE WEEKEND of Team Fortress 2, starting right now! Last but not least, today's the day we reveal our all-new website. Want a link to it? Too bad--you're already there! View the full article
  5. The Sniper Update is upon us. View the full article
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